B'nei Mitzvah
B'nei Mitzvah Introduction
Expectations
Questions?
B'nei Mitzvah Committee
B’nei Mitzvah Workshops for 2022-24 (coming soon!)
B'nei Mitzvah
In the Havurah Shalom community, we enact our mission through values such as inclusivity, respect, participation, Torah, lovingkindness, sustainability, and transparency. The goals of the program we have developed for youth to become b’nei mitzvah are expressions of these same values:
- to make the preparation for b’nei mitzvah Jewishly meaningful
- to help families and children develop deeper connections within the Havurah community
- to provide some consistency across family experience
- to help maintain Havurah culture and values of participation and community investment
Expectations
The three-year cohort program begins when youth are of fifth grade age. The expectations are:
Grade 5 Families
- Participation in Shabbat School (or equivalent if Shabbat School is not appropriate for family for specific reasons; determined by Education Director and Rabbi)
- Participation in two “Discovering Shabbat” morning services or equivalent
Grade 6 Families
- Participation in Shabbat School (or equivalent if Shabbat School is not appropriate for family for specific reasons; determined by Education Director and Rabbi)
- Participation in Shabbat Morning Services
- Participation in parent or family workshops, such as “Whose B’nei Mitzvah is it Anyway?”
Grade 7 Families
- Participation in all of Middle School or, at least, b’nei mitzvah cohort classes (4-5 in autumn)
- Participation in b’nei mitzvah related parent or family workshops
- Attendance at cohort b’nei mitzvah
- Participation in or leading a Torah service prior to their own b’nei mitzvah
Questions?
If you have questions about the b'nei mitzvah process or other questions related to b'nei mitzvah planning, please contact Carrie Kirschner, our Youth Education and B'nei Mitzvah Program Coordinator.
For questions about date selection or changes, please contact Amanda Coffey, B’nei Mitzvah Committee Chair
For questions about a Mitzvah Project/Tikkun Olam Project please contact Laura Orgel, B’nei Mitzvah Committee Member
For any questions related to family dynamics and learning needs, contact Deborah Eisenbach-Budner or Rabbi Benjamin.
B'nei Mitzvah Committee
Chaired by Amanda Coffey, the B'nei Mitzvah Committee helps arrange Havurah's b'nei mitzvah process. This includes collaborating with staff members to provide the workshops listed below, to create and maintain materials and resources, and to support families during the three-year journey. Committee members are Michael Evans, Julie Hastings, Judy Laura Orgel, Chari Smith, Abigail Webb, Liza Springgate and Sarah Shine.
B’nei Mitzvah Workshops for 2023-24 (5784) coming soon!
B'nei Mitzvah Cohort
Youths being called to the Torah this year will build community and ask, “What does being Jewish and becoming bar, bat, or b’nei mitzvah mean to me?” Led by Rabbi Benjamin.
B'nei Mitzvah Logistics Workshop
Planning and setup at Havurah. A walk through the B’nei Mitzvah Handbook with Carrie Kirschner, Youth Education and B'nei Mitzvah Program Coordinator.
B’nei Mitzvah: Beginning the Journey/Date Selection
This workshop for parents will focus on the rite of passage itself, then on the date-selection process. Led by Rabbi Benjamin, Deborah Eisenbach-Budner and the B’nei Mitzvah Committee.
Whose B'nei Mitzvah Is It Anyway?
This workshop is for families with students in grades 6 and 7 who haven't taken the workshop before. Like any life-cycle ceremony, b’nei mitzvah come to be about much more than the stated purpose – marking a passage of a child coming of age. What are some of the important explicit – and sometimes hidden – factors, choices, and messages? This workshop is not about logistics or expectations: it is about the meaning(s) of b'nei mitzvah and its power as a rite of passage for the whole family. Together we will explore the hopes and fears that inspire, inform, and complicate the preparation and planning process. How can we feel more connected to our child in this process? Our partner or ex-partner? Our family of origin? The rituals and liturgy? The community? How do we celebrate the occasion in a way that honors these connections and our values? This frank and non-judgmental workshop is about the big questions and how they impact the concrete decisions that parents and youth are called upon to make.
Drash and Service Workshop
Rabbi Benjamin will guide students and parents in responding to the text with their own questions and walk through the Shabbat morning service.
B'nei Mitzvah Even Planning 101
We will break the event planning process into manageable steps. Led by Chari Smith.
Please check our online calendar to confirm the dates and times above.
B'nei Mitzvah Treasury
Log in as a member to access the B'nei Mitzvah Treasury which includes expectations, calendars, list of tutors, the service outline and other important resources.
Resources
- B’nei Mitzvah Handbook (updates pending)
- Additional Guidelines (PDF) for when your bar/bat mitzvah falls on a Shabbat School date
- Tutors: For a current list, contact Carrie Kirschner, the B'nei Mitzvah Program Coordinator at carrie@havurahshalom.org
- Shabbat Morning service outline (coming soon!)
- Deborah Eisenbach-Budner’s Illustrated Guide to a Shabbat Morning Service (PDF)
- Being called up for an aliyah is an honor. These are the words to the blessings before and after a Torah reading. You can listen to recordings of the blessings below:
- Goleil Instructions - The Goleil or Gelilah dresses the Torah when a reading is done.
- Magbiah Instructions - The Magbiah lifts the Torah scroll after the reading.
- Sample Letter for Aliyah Invite & Other Honorees
Sat, December 2 2023
19 Kislev 5784
Need Help? If you are a Havurah member in need of help, log in to find resources here.
Havurah Updates
Hineinu: Rebecca Clarren Book Convo, Adult B'nei Mitzvah Due Date, Kabbalat Shabbat, Chanukah
The Cost of Free Land: Jews, Lakota, and an American Inheritance by Havurahnik Rebecca Clarren
5:30 to 7 pm, Wednesday,
Hineinu Correction: Regarding Two Events Tomorrow (Tuesday, November 28)
Correction: Upcoming Havurah Events
Havurah Book Group to Discuss The
Upcoming Events
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Saturday ,
DecDecember 2 , 2023
Shabbat, Dec 2nd 3:00p to 5:15p
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Saturday ,
DecDecember 2 , 2023
Shabbat, Dec 2nd 5:15p to 8:00p
Grade 4 Shabbat School class gets together to hang out and have fun! -
Sunday ,
DecDecember 3 , 2023
Sunday, Dec 3rd 10:00a to 12:00p
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Sunday ,
DecDecember 3 , 2023
Sunday, Dec 3rd 6:30p to 8:00p
Watch Selma before we meet, and we'll discuss the film together over Zoom. (Film rating: PG-13; teens welcome to join too.) -
Monday ,
DecDecember 4 , 2023
Monday, Dec 4th 1:00p to 4:00p
We are excited to bring mahjong back to Havurah. It is a fun, social activity that builds community, encouraging new friendships and cementing old ones. And while some of us may play elsewhere as well, we all agreed that restoring its place as an ongoing congregational activity will be a good fit for Havurah and those of us who play or want to learn the game. So please don't hesitate to join us! -
Monday ,
DecDecember 4 , 2023
Monday, Dec 4th 7:00p to 8:30p
We will explore the military occupation of the West Bank, East Jerusalem, and the Gaza Strip through film, lectures, and discussion. We will ask questions about the declared purposes, political and legal foundations, impact, and future of the Occupation. Led by Joel Beinin. -
Tuesday ,
DecDecember 5 , 2023
Tuesday, Dec 5th 7:00p to 8:30p
Join members of the Havurah Leadership Development Committee to learn more about our unique community and the ways we all support each other in our participatory culture. All members are welcome to join us! -
Tuesday ,
DecDecember 5 , 2023
Tuesday, Dec 5th 7:00p to 8:30p
Eyal Bitton is the cantor at Portland's Neveh Shalom and was raised in the Moroccan Jewish community in Montreal. Through lecture and song, he will examine various elements of Moroccan sacred music—synagogue song, cantillation of sacred texts, the piyyut (liturgical poetry), and life cycle songs. Moroccan Jews have a very rich and proud religious culture, and a varied and ancient musical tradition, reflecting its Moroccan milieu, its Andalusian heritage, and more. -
Tuesday ,
DecDecember 5 , 2023
Tuesday, Dec 5th 7:30p to 8:45p
Jewish text study is similar to tuning a radio. Each type of text—TaNaKH (Bible), Rabbinic Literature (Midrash and Talmud), Medieval Commentary (Rashi, ibn Ezra, Nachmanides) and Mystical (Kabbalistic and Hasidic)—operates on a different frequency. Each seeks to clarify what we are hearing about the world, following a set of rules. Each reads the world’s signals. We will spend two weeks tuning into specific passages from the four genres. Hebrew is not necessary for this overview , although we will read some of the “greatest hits” together in the original. Transistor radios preferred to digital, because we are all subject to static. Led by Rabbi Joey Wolf. -
Wednesday ,
DecDecember 6 , 2023
Wednesday, Dec 6th 4:00p to 6:00p